"Listen, if you want to unlock ultimate confidence, if you want to feel like your authentic self and vibrate on the highest level, you need to get to know who you are."
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This journey is all about studying yourself—understanding what you like, what you don't, what you accept, and what you will not accept.
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When you truly know your behaviors and beliefs, no one can tell you otherwise.
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Realize that what you are right now is just made of beliefs—beliefs given to you by your parents, your friends, society.
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“I think a lot of times... if, for example, beauty standards weren't there, a lot of people wouldn't look how they look right now.”
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And the same goes for jobs, roles, and more. When there is no fixed self, you can change it.
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You have the power to become who you feel is most authentic and makes you the happiest.
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How you talk to yourself shapes who you are.
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When I was young, I was told I wasn't smart, so I doubted my intelligence even as an adult.
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But now, I reaffirm to myself: “No, you are smart. You know so much. You have so much knowledge.”
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If someone once told you you're not beautiful, you can counter that by looking in the mirror and saying, “You are the most gorgeous, hottest thing on earth.
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Wow, when I look at you, I am mesmerized.”
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Beauty is a made-up societal structure. You can create your own perception of who you are.
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Ask yourself: Are you acting or reacting to life?
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For instance, when someone invites you for coffee or a date, pause and check in with your heart: “Is this what I really want, or am I just saying yes to please others?”
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When your yes and no come from your true desires, you'll begin to live authentically—and that authenticity builds confidence.
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Know what you will and will not accept in your relationships and life.
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For example, if in a relationship loyalty is a non-negotiable for you, then once that trust is broken, you must stand firm in your boundary.
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This clarity is crucial. When you stand on your boundaries, people will start to respect you more—even if they try to negotiate or beg, your self-worth remains intact.
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Understand what triggers you and where those feelings come from.
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I used to hate when teachers told me what to do because at home I was controlled, and that triggered deep wounds.
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Therapy has taught me that knowing your triggers makes you realize you're not crazy or a bad person—you're just reacting to past wounds.
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Acknowledge your feelings, let them out, and then work on healing them.
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“Release it if it's crying for months, release it. Do whatever you have to do until it's gone.”
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Notice the patterns that keep repeating in your life.
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I saw my father’s abusive behavior mirrored in my relationships until I took responsibility and decided to break the cycle.
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Blame gives power to those who hurt you, but taking responsibility gives you power over your own life. Decide: “I am going to become the best version of myself.”
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This is how you come out on top—by refusing to be a victim and owning your life.
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Be mindful of who feeds you and who takes from you.
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When I was with someone who drained me, I felt depressed and isolated. Once I reconnected with my family and friends, I felt alive again.
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Choose friends and partners whose lifestyles and energy align with your goals.
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If you find people who only party to escape reality, know that eventually, you may start to lose yourself in that same pattern.
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“Choose wisely who you surround yourself with.”
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My sister always reminds me: “Live in the now.”
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Too often, we’re chasing the future—always thinking, “What’s next?”—and in doing so, we miss the beauty of the present.
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Appreciate what you have right now. Goals are great, but don’t let them enslave you.
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The future is built from the actions and the appreciation of the present moment.
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What people think of you is none of your business.
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Whether they say you're amazing or not good enough, remember that you cannot control someone else's mind.
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Accept that criticism is a part of life. When you live authentically and fearlessly, you don't have time to worry about the opinions of millions.
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Your focus should be on creating your best life and unlocking the confident, authentic self that you already are.
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Believing in yourself connects you to the highest version of you.
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When everyone else tells you, “You don’t deserve that,” stand firm and say, “I do. I want to live like a queen. I deserve the best.”
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That belief is transformative. “Start to say to yourself: I want to be the most confident, beautiful, amazing, smart person that I am.”
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Because when you believe it, life will change fast—you will unlock that version of you who is free, confident, and unstoppable.
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Remember, studying yourself is the key to unlocking ultimate confidence. Get to know who you are—your likes, dislikes, boundaries, and triggers.
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Release the past, live in the now, and choose to surround yourself with energy that lifts you up.
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Take responsibility for your life, believe in yourself, and never let anyone or anything tell you otherwise.
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“You are a free spirit, a free soul that came to this earth to live your best life possible.”
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Live that truth, and watch your life transform.
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I hope this helps you on your journey. I see you in the next chapter—keep studying yourself and shining bright. Love you!
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